11/1/11

And then I changed.

So here she is. The world at her fingertips.

Feel sorry or feel grateful, it is a choice.


Take it in. Cry a minute. Then move on. Bigger things are yet to come. The greatest love will be here soon. The passion will be there, the love and the commitment, too. Not only surface but deep within.

This girl will love again.

Photobucket


Translation:

This girl is single. A little heartbroken, but it will only last so long. I will only LET it last so long.

Blessings:

Booked another wedding
Have an engagement session in 2 weeks
Getting LOTS of feedback on my photography
Support from my fam
Work is AMAZING
Best friend is always there. Always.
Feeling inspired. Yeah yeah.


Okay.... so I have to ask. And I'm not looking for sympathy, I promise. But when dealing with a breakup...what do you do? What have you done? What do you wish to change?

***side note. I'm being very optimistic about this right now. I'll give the honest truth tomorrow. check back on me.***

And yes, I was a blowup doll for Halloween :)

33 comments:

Rissy said...

When I go through a break-up, I get a sweet apartment in an awesome city with my bloggy friend Carissa...

ok reality? I stopped acting like myself for about a year and totally lost focus. Please please please don't do that-- although I think that warning is completely unnecessary because I can't imagine you doing that. I'd basically say don't make any big decisions in the next couple weeks/months because you are going through a lot emotionally.

XOXO and obviously you know you can contact me any time : )

oh p.s. HIS LOSS (Id feel like a bad friend if I didn't point out the obvious)

Young and Fabulous said...

i wish I could give you a big old squeeeeze :-) you're so strong. you're going to get through this better than you think!

just remember what i texted you about being single ;-) teehee!

on a more serious note, I broke up with my ex boyfriend of 3 years back in freshman year of college...just a messy abusive relationship that was going NOWHERE! Sure you'd think I would be all psshh see ya because he was a jerk, but it still hurt leaving someone you knew for so long...had shared so much together, etc.

I kept busy (as you seem to be! look at you, you busy bee!) Tried to just let lose and embrace the time I had by myself, and really just got closer and closer to my friends who were all there to pick me up. Sabrina...I spent 3 awesome days with you and I KNOW how awesome of a person you are. Your "Mr Right" is out there somewhere I just KNOW it :-)

Love you girl!
xoxoxo

Kelly said...

I think thinking optimistically is the first step, so you're doing great :)

I haven't really been through a breakup because I've been with my boyrfriend for a long time, but things aren't going very well with us right now, and haven't been for a while. So I'll probably be asking for the same advice if we end up breaking up... Love is so confusing, but I try and keep thinking that if he's not the right one, eventually the right one will come.

p.s. you are one gorgeous blow-up doll! haha!

Jess said...

Turn to your friends when you need support, and don't try to jump into a relationship right away. You'll find Mr. Right when it is right for you. I broke up with my fiancee (yes, we were engaged) after 3 years together, but met my husband the next week or so. I think that if I had been looking for my next relationship, I would have ended up with a "rebound", but because I didn't care about a relationship, I ended up with the love of my life. Trust that your friends will be there to love you and support you through everything that you may feel. You can always talk to me if you need someone.

Alex Byer said...

Things I've done following a breakup: Ate a lot of ice cream (subsequently threw up everywhere because I'm lactose intolerant). Bought new shoes. Bought a new purse. Ate my feelings in all forms of carbs. Flew to Texas. Cried. Watched Breakfast at Tiffany's. Watched Love Actually. Cried some more. Ran. Did yoga. Talked with my girlfriends. Cried some more.

Honestly, there's no clear-cut solution. But remember to do what makes you happy. That's what matters the most.

choose to be happy blog said...

I think you are the cutest of cute.

I hate breakups. Ugh hate them. but my advice:

Cry. Have closure. Stay busy. Surround yourself with friends. cut off any communication

One of my fav quotes from how I met your mother:

“the one for you is coming and hes getting here as fast as he can” :)

and believe that. but the great thing is, i think you already do xoxooo

Nicole said...

I went through a bad breakup last year, and the best advice I can give you is to only worry about how you're going to get through ONE day at a time. Sounds cliche, but if you think about how you're going to get through the next few months, it's almost crushing. Wake up each day and think through what that ONE day's plans consists of - school, work, friends, etc. Before you know it, you'll be looking back smiling!!

suzie q. said...

Cry. I think crying is super theraputic and there's no shame in it. Just do it when you're alone or with your closest friend.

Then, I fake it 'til I make it. There's also no shame in putting on a happy face when you're in public. The last break up I went through, I focused on myself and found so many hidden passions.

This, too, shall pass...

Krisha said...

My prayers go out to you! Stay strong girl!! God has bigger and better things for you!

Torrie said...

Go you for still noticing the positive, keep that up! Don't lose focus, it's so easy to do after a breakup, but stay strong and continue to look towards the future!

For the moments where I really wanted to lose it, I went for a drive, listened to some tunes I could BELT OUT (sad AND happy!) and it's odd but still a great release! No joke, I've done it....plenty of times haha

Your costume is adorable and hysterical all at the same time, I love it!

Karen said...

You have such a positive outlook. That is what will get you through it! And being so optimistic will bring the right one into your arms. Your blow up doll costume is a riot! :)

Lauren Nicole said...

Love the way you wrote this.

Also love your optimism.

Let me tell you, when I went through my breakup with Nick last year -- I was the furthest thing from having a positive outlook. I felt sorry for myself, made stupid decisions, and shut myself out from everything/everyone around me...

UNTIL I realized that I was 21, going on 22, and I had my ENTIRE life ahead of me. This was the PERFECT opportunity to keep myself occupied with things that were going to make me SMILE. Making a new playlist and taking a jog around my town, spending time with my family (even more than I already did), buying some arts & crafts and letting my creativity take me to a fun, happy place. I didn't blog as much and I regret it, because it was (and still is) my outlet. It relieves all anger, stress, and hurt.

It's okay to think about him. It's okay to remember your great memories. But also acknowledge what brought you to the breakup. Be grateful that you realized sooner than later that separate ways was what was best for YOU.

Time. Heals. All.

You're a pretty girl with a beautiful soul and will have no problem in finding your prince charming. Just let go and let be.

I'm sorry. I just wrote a novel.
xoxo

Anonymous said...

You should maybe get a couple of besties and road trip.

Chelsea said...

I love how you said you will only LET the heartbreak last so long. I'm going through the worst break-up of my life right now aka a divorce and reading that little part really just helped me, so thank you for that. In my past, I've gotten entirely lost after a break-up. It was so hard for me to be okay with being alone after being with another person for so long. I turned to going out with friends all the time, making impulse decisions, and just trying my best to ignore what had happened. I'd recommend not doing that :)

In this particular situation of mine, I've really taken the time to feel out my emotions. I think it's important to look at the positive, but to also be realistic. Some days are harder than others and if you cry yourself to sleep for the next week or so, that's okay. Take this opportunity to better yourself, to find the beauty in this world, and to be grateful for the things you DO have. Because, in the end, I believe everything happens for a reason.

Some advice I've received while going through this is that one day, when I DO have Mr. Right with me, I'm going to be so grateful for these moments of heartbreak right now. I'll be so thankful that I didn't end up with Mr. Wrong! Take it each day at a time. I think it's so easy to focus on how lonely you are or how much you wish he was next to you or how badly you just want to text him, but don't let your mind go there. Stay strong and just keep the focus on yourself right now. The rest will fall into place when the time is right :) Sending a big hug your way, beautiful! xoxo

ashley said...

Your sense of humor is amazing!! :) Blowup doll-- hilarious! (and dare I say cute idea?) hahaha

Breakups are never great but I always rely on great friends and realizing there is a reason things happen. It's a perfect time to pick up a new hobby or really throw yourself into a passion (photography). I always find that during breakups I become especially close with friends. I have more time for my family and for myself. And usually I am in the best shape of my life. The blog world is a perfect clutch during this transition and I'm sure you have tons of amazing friends as well!! :) Be up front, tell them you need them! :)
At least that's what I do!
oxox all the best lady!

Ali said...

Oh gosh, I know exactly how you are feeling right now. I went through the same exact crap about 7-8 months ago. I was in a fantastic relationship...head over heels in love...or so I thought. He broke up with me and it was so unexpected, I just didn't get it.

I couldn't eat (literally didn't eat for 3 days from feelings of nausea), couldn't sleep, and couldn't be alone. My advice is to stay busy, just like it seems you are! And count on friends more than ever before. Family, too! That's what they are there for!

Also, when I became single I started my blog because it kept me busy, so you've already got a head start!

I'm so glad you're so optimistic about this because I know I was a wreck and never thought I would heal...things DO get better though, I promise!

Just keep like a busy, busy bee! :)

xoxo
-Ali

melissa rose said...

Break ups SUCK, but I'm glad you're being so optimistic and positive about it. State of mind is the first step to healing i think.

As for remedies for a broken heart, there's no fail-proof plan, but I find blasting girl power music (I don't need a man - PCD; who run the world - Beyonce; Since u been gone - Kelly Clarkson)while driving is always good for the soul.
And pick up a hobby that you loved doing but kind of disappeared after you started dating. I went through a bad break up back in Feb and reconnected with so many gfs I forgot to make the time for while i was "happily" in a relationship. They definitely helped heal the wounds!

arianapia said...

Honestly, I wish I had the strength you do! The optimism you have in your post is a breath of fresh air!

Breakups are the absolute worst but everyone goes through them. You choose how you come out on the other side. Even though it ended, I'm sure you had good times together. Remember those. Cry if you want to. All these things will heal you and let you appreciate that he was just what you wanted/needed at the time.

And really? He's just helping you figure out what you really want, because don't you deserve a love that is absolutely beautiful?

Live deep and true to yourself and lean on your friends.

I've really enjoyed reading your blog! Thank you for the lovely optimism. I haven't gone through a break up in a while but sometimes you need the reminder. :)

Kelsey Cunningham said...

Break ups suck. After my break up, I sulked for about a month and shut the world out, some much needed me time. Then I decided I couldn't do that any longer. I threw myself into school, work, my relationships with my friends and family. I deleted his number, email, facebook, etc. No temptation to contact him at all. It was all about me and it was the best feeling in the world.

It takes time to get over someone but I've always found that you need to focus on the future instead of dwelling about the past.

Keep being optimistic :) You'll be back in action before you know it.

xo, Kels
Eat, Drink, Be a Tourist

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about your breakup girl. Since I’m kind of messed up in the head, whenever I ended relationships, got dumped, whatever, I would isolate myself; I’d only leave my room to go to work. Again… my head is all kinds of effed up. You’ll get through it! And on that note, I LOVE your Halloween costume. Amazing.

Neely said...

Im going through a breakup now too. I try to reflect as much as I can. If you want to vent or have a bloggy support group let me know :)

So shay said...

Love you so much Sabrina! Just remember you're wonderful and deserve THE BEST! His loss (I agree with Rissy) and just know I'm always here for you! (Insert my voicemail from the other day here) Love you!

Megan said...

aw girlfriend...im so so sorry to hear this :( Break ups are never easy..allow yourself time to grieve the loss, allow yourself to feel all the emotions..but dont dwell..to beat yourself up..dont isolate..the breakups prepare you for the perfect person..i can fully atest to this :)

Megan said...

Love love love your positive attitude!!! Sorry about the breakup. Being hurt sucks...there's no way around it. I cry, vent to my girls, and eat a lot. Haha. : ) Love you so much! I'll be praying for you! Just think how much better the NEXT one will be!!

Keri said...

I've been reading your blog for a month or so now & i think this is my first comment...just wanted to say that break-ups suck (no other way to say it) but you seem like you have the world on your side. good attitude, friends, family AND you're super pretty ;) I think you'll make it through this and be happy you did, fo' sho. you're right..the greatest love is yet to come.

I'm at a fork in the road, so to speak, with my boyfriend and I'm really not sure which way we're going to go (staying together or splitting up). But I keep reminding myself of advice my best friend gave me YEARS ago: "a setback is a set-up for a comeback" so go make your comeback! and don't forget that it's okay to cry while you're making it :)

Ashley said...

hmmmm...every girls been through this and it never gets an easier. i actually just went through this myself. after nine years you think you know someone...ahh! anyways, in times like this its okay to cry, yell, be sad, laugh, smile...DO whatever you feel! Thats the only way to get through this. Everything will be okay...you have a great attitude anyways! Just following your blog, you seem like such a sweet heart and your so darn cute...God is def writing your love story! :) Keep your head up pretty girl!!!

Stephanie said...

First things first...I am so so sawwy!! You HAVE to keep yourself busy...go out with friends, work later, workout more (not that you need to...DUH!), BLOG!, do anything and everything your little heart desires.

One thing that kept me broken up with exes was to just not talk to them again. I was never good at the whole "lets be friends" thing...as long as I talked to an ex, we always got back together so my advice...if you don't want to get back together with him...is to keep out of contact with him.

You're a doll and I'm confident Mr. Right is out there for you...I mean, who wouldn't wanna snatch you up?! (In a total non-creepy way...lol)

Anyways-I know there's not a whole lot anyone can say or do to make anything better right now but just know that God has a plan for EVERYTHING and although you may not understand it right now...you will understand it one day! xo

Oh-blowup doll costume=AMAZING!!!! SO perfect!!

... said...

This is something that most of us have had to endure...and it is never easy for any of us. I would say that surrounding yourself with amazing friends and family and placing it all in God's hands...is the only way to go! :) Praying for you hun!

Wandering Mind said...

Hi,
I stumbled across your blog awhile ago and I've enjoyed reading it. :) You seem like an amazing person, so keep your chin up! I'm sure something better is just around the corner!

angie on maui said...

So sorry to read about your break up. :( Break-ups suck, but you will get through it! Surround yourself with real friends who will remind you how fabulous you are. Give yourself permission to be sad about it (it's ok to cry), but don't wallow. Acknowledge and appreciate The Good in the relationship and let go of The Bad (it's good karma). Get up and keep moving forward. And don't forget that God is also there to carry you when you're weak. Let Him shoulder some of the pain, too.

You're a beautiful person, Sabrina. Both inside and out; don't ever forget that!

xoxo

Unknown said...

I just adore your blog, and this post shows why perfectly. I love that you're not afraid to be completely yourself. I feel like so many bloggers try to present the most perfect image of themselves, and you're okay with being real and showing that not every day is going to go perfect. You're gorgeous, but you're not constantly flaunting it. You seem so down to earth, so connected and so at peace with everything. I know that you're going through some really rough stuff right now, but I just wanted to remind you how incredible you are. :)

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